A Dog, A Tranny and A Swimmer

No that's not the title of my new film, but some of the things featuring in it.

The elements this winter have hit me hard, mainly the snow. All my ideas were hampered by the white stuff.

Yet i've kept going. I'm now about to...

Make a film about me making a film and failing.

'I've come up with a brilliant idea that happens outside, then my mum shouts "it's snowing" so i'm depressed. I start flicking through my book for ideas and I try and do one indoors, about my dog. She's not doing anything but sleeping, so this idea fails. I then try and make a film about Liphook, so decide to interview some of the 'interesting' residents. A Tranny, part of the Liphook Transvestite Club (yes it does exist). They turn up and I interview them, he sees me scratch my leg and starts to become suggestive over the idea that I could be a Tranny too! I'm against this idea but my girlfriend thinks it would be funny. Meanwhile my dad is unaware there's a tranny in the house and when he finally meets him he seems to recognise him from school... "Dave?" "no my name is Linda" "no no it's Dave we went to school together!" The Tranny flees.
The next idea involves me trying to make my house fun by swimming in the hall way. The camera is pointing at the fish tank, i'm bored so I wander off. My dad comes downstairs and moves the camera so he can work on the fishtank. He spills some water on the floor. Meanwhile i'm getting a drink in the kitchen. My dad notices the puddle on the floor and goes to get a towel. I come back to discover the camera has been moved, I briskly go to grab the camera but before I can I slip on the puddle of water and go flying, landing on my back. The screen goes fuzzy and starts to spin.


I wake up on the sofa in the lounge. Compose myself then realise I could make a film using the snow! I start singing snow related songs to myself and begin writing in a notebook. I then grab a coat, and a scarf, head to the front door and open it.


From the outside I shout the film "SNOW DAY" only for a quick zoom out to reveal that all the snow has now gone.'

The End.

Characters:
Darren
Dani (girlfriend)
Mum
Dad
Dog
Tranny

Locations:
My House - Landing, Bedroom, Kitchen, Utility Room, Lounge, Bathroom, Hallway

Props:
Camera
Bucket
Notepad
Idea Journal
Pen
Snorkel
Fishtank Equipment
Stockings

Costume:
Tranny Stuff - Wig, Jewellery, Dress
Swimming Stuff - Shorts

Title: Darren Martin - Filmmaker
Approximate Run-Time: 3 Minutes
Certificate: U
Release Date: 2011